On emotional connection, the energy we carry, and finding our way back to ourselves.
Hi lovely,
Come sit with me for a little while.
Have you ever spent time with someone who was moving through something difficult and found yourself feeling some of that emotion, too?
Perhaps a friend was grieving, someone you love was anxious, or you sat beside a person who was feeling particularly overwhelmed.
And even though those feelings weren't originally yours, you could feel something of their experience within yourself.
There's nothing inherently wrong with that.
In fact, it's part of what makes us human.
We're relational beings. We respond to one another, emotionally, physically and, as I believe, energetically.
Our ability to feel alongside another person helps us recognise when someone needs comfort, understand experiences beyond our own and build meaningful connections.
We aren't meant to move through life completely unaffected by the people around us.
But there's a difference between sharing an emotional moment with someone and continuing to carry the weight of their experience long after you've parted ways.
Sometimes that heaviness follows us home.
It settles into our thoughts, our bodies and the way we move through the rest of our day.
And sometimes, days, weeks or even months later, we're still holding onto something that began in a conversation or an experience with someone else.
That's when it can be worth gently asking ourselves:
What am I still carrying, and why?
Because feeling with someone is part of connection.
But continuing to carry their experience as though it were our responsibility can slowly pull us away from our own lives.
🌿 The Energy We Carry
In energy healing, we often speak about recognising what belongs to us and what doesn't.
But I believe there's something important to understand here.
Not every uncomfortable feeling is someone else's energy, and not every emotion we experience in response to another person needs to be released.
Sometimes we're simply moved by what someone is going through.
Sometimes their experience awakens something within us. A memory, a fear, an old hurt or a concern for someone we love.
And sometimes we're exhausted, overwhelmed or already carrying more than we have the capacity to hold.
From a psychological perspective, our nervous systems continually respond to the people and environments around us.
We notice facial expressions, tone of voice, tension and subtle changes in behaviour, often without consciously realising it.
Emotional contagion is one way researchers describe how feelings can spread between people. Empathy also allows us to understand and resonate with another person's experience.
These responses aren't inherently unhealthy. They're part of our capacity for connection.
From an energetic perspective, I understand this as part of the way we interact with the world beyond what we can physically see.
I believe we're energetic beings, constantly in relationship with the energy around us.
For me, these understandings don't need to compete.
They offer different ways of exploring the same human experience.
The question isn't always whether a feeling belongs to us.
Sometimes the more useful question is whether we're still carrying it long after it has served its purpose.
🌸 When Caring Becomes Carrying
There's a difference between being present with someone's pain and taking responsibility for it.
And there's also a difference between feeling something deeply and needing to hold onto it indefinitely.
We can sit with a grieving friend and feel sadness.
We can comfort an anxious child and feel some of their worry.
We can listen to someone share a painful experience and find ourselves genuinely moved.
None of those things mean we've failed to maintain our boundaries.
They're moments of human connection.
But sometimes, particularly when we're naturally caring people, that connection can begin to turn into responsibility.
We replay conversations. We search for solutions. We worry about what might happen next.
We might even feel guilty for laughing, resting or enjoying our own lives while someone else is struggling.
And gradually, something that began as compassion becomes a weight we're carrying.
We can feel alongside someone without making their experience ours to resolve.
We can love someone deeply without remaining immersed in their distress.
And we can acknowledge another person's suffering while still allowing ourselves moments of peace.
Sometimes the most loving thing we can do, for ourselves and the people around us, is recognise when it's time to gently put down what we've been carrying.
Not because we no longer care.
But because caring was never meant to require abandoning ourselves.
🔥 Returning to Your Own Centre
When I notice that I'm feeling scattered, heavy or disconnected from myself, I don't always need an elaborate ritual.
Sometimes I need to stop.
To notice what's happening in my body.
To recognise what I've been carrying.
And to consciously return my attention to myself.
I'd love to share a simple practice you can explore whenever you're feeling a little overwhelmed or energetically stretched.
A Gentle Practice for Gathering Your Energy
Find somewhere you can be comfortable for a few minutes.
You can sit, stand or even take a slow walk. There's no need to close your eyes unless that feels good to you.
1. Notice where you are.
Feel your feet against the ground or the support beneath your body.
Look around and take in your surroundings.
Allow yourself a moment to recognise that you're here, in this place, right now.
2. Check in with yourself.
Bring your attention to your body.
Is there tension in your shoulders? A heaviness in your chest? A restless feeling in your stomach?
You don't need to change anything.
Simply notice.
Ask yourself:
What am I feeling right now?
What have I been carrying today?
Is there something I'm taking responsibility for that isn't mine to resolve?
You don't need an immediate answer.
3. Gather your attention.
Imagine all the little threads of your attention that have been stretched across the day.
The conversations you've had. The things you've been worrying about. The tasks waiting for you. The people you've been thinking about.
With each comfortable breath, imagine gently gathering those threads back towards yourself.
Not pulling away from the people you love.
Not shutting out the world.
Simply bringing your attention home.
You might quietly say:
I return my attention to myself.
I release what isn't mine to carry.
I make space for my own needs, too.
4. Choose what you need next.
Before returning to your day, ask yourself one final question.
What would support me right now?
Perhaps it's a glass of water, a little quiet, some movement, a boundary that needs to be expressed or a conversation you've been avoiding.
Sometimes returning to ourselves means recognising that something in our lives needs to change.
And sometimes it simply means giving ourselves permission to rest.
🌿 Protection Isn't About Shutting the World Out
When we talk about energetic protection, it's easy to imagine that the goal is to create an impenetrable barrier between ourselves and everything around us.
But that's not how I understand it.
I don't want to move through life closed off from other people, from nature or from the experiences that make us human.
Connection is part of living.
For me, protection is about awareness, discernment and boundaries.
It's recognising when something is affecting us.
It's knowing that we can care without carrying.
And it's remembering that we have a choice about how much of ourselves we give to any particular situation.
Sometimes that choice is energetic.
Sometimes it's emotional.
And sometimes it's wonderfully practical, like turning off your phone, saying no or taking ten minutes to yourself.
These things aren't separate from spiritual practice.
They're part of how we tend to ourselves.
🌸 A Little Something to Remember
You don't need to be endlessly available to be loving.
You don't need to solve every problem to be compassionate.
And you don't need to carry the weight of the world to prove that you care.
The next time you find yourself feeling unusually heavy or stretched thin, see if you can resist the urge to immediately explain it away.
Instead, become curious.
Notice what's happening within you.
Consider what might be contributing to it.
And ask what you need.
Because returning to yourself isn't about abandoning the world around you.
It's about remembering that you belong within it, too.
Until next time,
Tash xx 🌿
🌿 A Little Something to Listen To
If you'd like a little guidance in gathering your attention and returning to yourself, I've created a meditation called
Gather Your Energy on Insight Timer.
A gentle space to pause, reconnect and come home to yourself.
